Marching In

Southampton  1  West Ham United  2

(The) Premier League

The Dell was a football ground I nearly went to.

It was back in the late Eighties when we used to travel to watch Derby County away games on Ernie Hallam’s ‘Roadrider’ coaches. With match ticket in hand and the bus just getting on the ring road, we were about to set off on the long journey to see the Rams play at Southampton.

I don’t know how news got to us, but it did, the game was off due to a frozen pitch. It was a quick turnaround, and back home we all went. I never went to the re-arranged game, opting for a refund instead. The Dell never did get visited, and then it was gone.

So, the quest to complete the 92 was about to reach 89 when it was spotted that Southampton’s game against West Ham United was being moved to the day after Boxing Day. It would involve a little family outing and an overnight stay, which Mrs H arranged as she is in charge of such important matters such as hotels and the like.

Tickets were procured well in advance, and after taking it a bit steadier on Boxing Day in terms of the otter sauce, it was an early departure to the South coast, and a City I only ever briefly visited the once when on holiday in Bournemouth.

The journey down was a breeze, taking the M1, cutting across on the A43 to the M40, and then taking the more scenic route down the A34 via Newbury. No hassles or hold ups and from door to door it was almost bang on three hours.

We chose to take in the sights during the afternoon, which basically consisted of a shopping centre and the impressive Ocean Village complex. It was while at the village that we spotted the West Ham team bus parked outside a hotel, so we decided to pay it a visit. Fully expecting my pants to be firmly pulled down after ordering drinks at the sixth floor bar of the Harbour Hotel, it was soon noticed that several members of the Hammers coaching staff were in discussions in the bar, along with some geezer off of Sky Sports who’s name escaped me. When the bill did arrive, I felt very little discomfort in the posterior region, the grand total wasn’t to damaging after all!

An Uber back to the hotel, which was located a mere eight minutes walk from the St Mary’s Stadium, meant time was on our side, and with the Church of the Drinker (JD Wetherspoon) only a few minutes away as well, our plan for the evening was nicely in place.

Call me a bit slow on the uptake, but it was while in the busy Spoons on London Road that I made a life changing discovery, the Wetherspoon App. From this marvel of modern technology you can order food and drink to your table, how good is that? Oh what fun I had ordering lager and chocolate brownies, I was happy as a pig in poo.

With the pub very busy with both home and away fans, it was time to make our way to the Saints temple. But first, it was a little detour down Old Northam Road to the super little programme shop, where all things shiny and glittery could be purchased at very reasonable prices. The main route into Saint Mary’s is via the footbridge over the railway line, which leads down onto the stadium concourse, and with just under an hour until kick off it was thronging with folk looking to catch a glimpse of Southampton’s recent upturn in form since the appointment of Ralph Rabbit Hutch (look it up, seriously!)

Saint Mary’s is not dissimilar to the many stadiums built around the same time. Middlesbrough, Derby County, Leicester City and Swansea City are all of a similar ilk and consist of an uninterrupted bowl, albeit in the case of the Saints, like with Leicester, it’s all on one tier.

Pre-match, as some clubs do nowadays, they put on a superb fireworks and light show which involved co-ordinated switching off and on of the floodlight bulbs. It would have been superb I might add, only we didn’t see it as Mrs H suddenly decided she needed a wee.

The atmosphere was very good, despite the fact Southampton only seem to have one song which is something about ‘marching in’. The Hammers boys and girls were also in very god voice, as they always are from experience, especially on their travels. A capacity crowd of over 31,500 crammed in to watch a game that has probably been hyper analysed by various Sky pundits down to the exact yardage run by every player multiplied by the calorific boxing day intake, minus highest score on Fortnite. Suffice to say, after going a goal down to a Nathan Redmond strike just after half time, a brace from some Brazilian chap called Anderson sealed a deserved win for an impressive Irons side.

A quick departure at the final whistle as the sounds of ‘Fortunes always hiding, I’ve looked everywhere’ rang from the away end, and we were back in the hotel bar just over ten minutes later to reflect on a very enjoyable day, along with many West Ham fans who’d also taken the opportunity of an overnight stay.

It mattered not that the draught lager packed up and we had to resort to bottles, I’d done ground 89, and discovered the Wetherpoons App all in one day. What’s not to like about a trip to Southampton, even if it wasn’t courtesy of Ernie-Tours and didn’t take in the Dell?