Social Media & The Armadillo

Staffordshire Moorlands  1  Leek CSOB Reserves  3

Friendly

Had it not been for the power of social media, Steve and I would never have had the ground breaking idea which would revolutionise future visits to Yorkshire Wildlife Park.

Both of our other halves, Rachael and Julie, have annual passes to the aforementioned park, and on the occasions when they are accompanied by myself and Steve, one of the must see attractions is without doubt the armadillo.

The armadillo reminds us of a remote control vehicle, it scurries around, typically in circles, yet due to it's construction you can't see it's legs, so it looks like an armoured car that's being operated from a distance!

The armadillo is the boss, but, it was while having a pint at the Ye Olde Crown Hotel in Waterhouses, that we had the idea. It's a bit like the entertainment you get at half time in football matches, where someone sticks their forehead on a pole and spins round it a few times, before staggering towards a football and ultimately ending up on their arse as the crowd cheers. Well, what about flipping an armadillo onto it's back, spinning it around a few times, and then putting it back on his feet and seeing where it ends up? You could take bets as to it's final destination? It would be a real crowd puller, the kids would love it, groundbreaking even.

I suspect Yorkshire Wildlife Park might take a bit of convincing, but we can be quite persuasive, and I think in time the armadillo will actually quite enjoy it, I mean, it can't be very exciting running round in circles, think Scalectrix, how boring does that get after a bit?

The Facilities - In Keeping

So what the hell has this got to do with football? Well, take today, up until Wednesday night I was torn between a gigantic jaunt up to South Shields or a spin across towards the Welsh border to watch Malpas. But then Steve tells me he's been chatting to a chap from Staffordshire Moorlands via Facebook, and it turns out he's found out they play their first ever game at their new home in Waterhouses. That was it then, that was both of our Saturdays sorted.

But not just that, not only was there real enthusiasm shown that someone from outside of the area was actually showing interest in the club and planning to visit, the guy from the club even went to the effort of sending a further message the night before the game to let us know the kick off had been moved forward to 2pm. How good was that? It reminded me of the experience I had with Staffordshire LA last season, dealing with such helpful, friendly and enthusiastic people is not only a huge assistance, but it also creates a real feel good factor about a club. How could you not like Staffordshire Moorlands after that experience?

What's Not To Like?

To be fair, when I saw them at their old ground in Leek last season, they were equally helpful then. I was concerned about the pitch, but the Secretary assured me that the pitch was fine, however, I was advised to keep a watch out for the fog. It was pretty foggy as I travelled the Ashbourne to Leek road, but once in Leek itself, we had no such problems.

So what of the ground? It's really nice, set behind some relatively newly built houses that are in keeping with the locality, it has a real rural feel to it. Throw in some sheep in the fields and the hills that sit behind and to the side of the pitch, and you have something of an idyllic setting.

The Sheep Have A Fine View

The facilities are set behind the goal in a communal building that again is built in the same style as the new houses, while at pitch side are a couple of sturdy dug outs. Despite heavy overnight rain the pitch was fine, and we found a small grass bank behind the bottom goal as a vantage point for the proceedings.

Moorlands have a young side and on the day they lost 3-1 to what looked to be a slightly more experienced Leek outfit. They did grow in confidence though and started to take the game to the visitors in the second period but that left them exposed at the back and in turn they conceded as a result. A missed penalty late in the first half didn't help the home sides cause either.

A very enjoyable afternoon, a really good football club set in a cracking location, I wish them  well for the rest of the season as they continue on their journey having only been formed just over a year ago.

Now for the armadillo........

The Armadillo Would Love It Here

White Rebel Paper Girl Eater

Kirk Deighton Rangers  1  Leeds Modernians  5

Friendly

Living in the tiny village of Fritchley as a child was a wonderful experience, but in all fairness, it was not what you would call the excitement capital of Derbyshire. In fact, excitement used to peak when a resident of the village acquired a new car, and when someone actually moved house, it was an event worthy of a village fete to mark the occasion!

It did get quite exciting once when one of our neighbours got a new dog. Like you do, myself and my little sister were invited round to have a look at the little white bundle of fur that was rolling around on the carpet. How lovely, a new friend, but, this was no ordinary dog, this was a Pyrenean Mountain Dog. What we didn’t know at that stage was just how big this bundle of fur, called Rebel, was going to become, and what the implications of that may be.

Six months later, we had a polar bear living next door, it was gigantic, and it didn’t seem very friendly or indeed happy. For large parts of the day it had the run of the yard, but it was kept securely on a chain that was attached to the side of the house, which meant it’s span of attack was limited, as long as you knew where exactly the chain stopped.

From time to time you would hear the gate go as an unsuspecting visitor entered the premises, this would then be followed by the sound of a chain dragging across the floor and then an almighty roar as Rebel decided the latest intruder was going to turn from visitor to victim.

The system worked, and no one was maimed by the 'Beast of Bullbridge', until one day when the papergirl made her regular visit, this time, as usual, Rebel leapt into action, the chain picked up pace but then disaster. As pebble dashed render fell from the weakened wall, Rebel was free, and the poor girl was about to have a life changing experience. Her arm took the brunt of it, but she battled free, and even managed to deliver our paper, a blood spattered Derby Evening Telegraph  popped through the door. But for Rebel, alas his days were numbered, we never saw him again after that, the incident was never talked about either, not publicly anyway.

Stunning Setting

What on earth has that got to do with a game of football at Kirk Deighton Rangers you might be wondering? More on that later, but first, who, what and why?

KDR have been promoted to the West Yorkshire League this season after winning the Harrogate and District League last term. Also joining them are Knaresborough Celtic and Hampsthwaite United, where I will visit later in the season, but for now, having seen from their very informative Twitter account that they had a friendly this evening, I decided to take a look early doors.

Kirk Deighton is an attractive village just at the side of the A1, on the northern edge of Wetherby. The ground is pretty much the first place you come to on the right hand side as you enter from the South, and it's a picturesque affair.

The Players Tunnel

The clubhouse and dressing rooms sit aside the small car park, and a short walk away is the railed pitch. One interesting feature is the fact that two large tree / hedge growths sit side by side on the half way line and form a strange kind of players tunnel to the pitch. Unless of course you choose to simply climb over the barrier!

They were a friendly bunch, so much so they let me sit in their dressing room while I had a pint. To be honest though, that wasn’t strictly the case, the home dressing room was being refurbished, and within a few minutes of being served the players were changing in what was the bar. I was the only non-player in the bar, so feeling slightly awkward I went outside.

Leeds Modernians play in the middle tier of the three tier league, and found themselves a goal down early in the game as KDR started powerfully and positively. But, as the half wore on it was the visitors who gained the upper hand and scored twice to take a half time lead.

The Clubhouse - My Attempt At Arty Photography

Modernians scored three more times in the second period to record an easy victory, but KDR can take some credit from their performance, I can’t see them struggling in the step up, they perhaps just need to acclimatise to the new surroundings.

So, what’s the significance of the dog then?

Well, it was mid way through the first half, and I heard a voice from behind me…

“What’s the score mate?”

I turned round and just as I was giving my answer, a couple were walking towards me with TWO Pyrenean Mountain Dogs on leads, or, gigantic polar bears to be more precise. Instantly I had a flashback to Rebel, I barely saw the game for twenty minutes, my eyes were transfixed by these two killing machines. All I could see though was the blood stained newspaper, all I could hear was the sound of that chain being pulled across the yard, it was like I’d been taken back 35 years to that fateful day. The owners and the dogs eventually left, I could relax and enjoy the game, but Rebel was still emblazoned in my mind.

Mind you, I never did find out what happened to the poor paper girl, but I very much doubt she’s living anywhere near Kirk Deighton….

Polar Bears - Two Of Them!

Normal Service

Retford  0  Hallam  3

Friendly

I think it was the point where I sat down with a pint in hand at the Babworth Sports & Social Club, that I realised normal service had resumed.

My words to Steve were to that effect, the terrible twosome were back on the road again for another season, a season that will no doubt be blighted by occupational hazards such as bad weather, re-arrangements, road closures and re-locations, but on the positive side, we should get some football in, some new grounds, and probably the odd beer or two.

I guess as well when we walked into the Babworth Lane home of Retford for the first midweek game of the new season,  and were greeted with a politically incorrect personal insult by a fellow blogger and local non-league enthusiast, it struck us that we were back on a ten month long adventure, of personal insults and political incorrectness!

Choo Choo

 This little jaunt entered the diary a couple of months back once Retford declared their intentions to relocate from the shared home of Retford United, to the ground previously used by BRSA Retford and Retford Rail amongst others.

Retford are a relatively new club, formed in 2015 and to be fair, when they first appeared on the map, for all intents and purposes, many of us assumed they were a pseudo reserve side to the aforementioned United. However, over the course of time it became clear that wasn’t the case, and once the move was announced, any possible remaining suggestions that they had a connection, were removed.  

For tonight’s friendly, we chose to partake in a pint in the Club which sits on the opposite side of the flyover to the ground. Steve had plenty of tales to tell about his recent trip to Sweden and a visit to see a team called Grebo. I was not so exotic, Dodworth, Rugby and Welling do not compare, but I suspect my beer was somewhat cheaper than he was paying in Scandinavia!

No Choo Choo

So what does Babworth Road look like? It sits alongside the East Coast Mainline so trains are aplenty, while the main road into the centre of Retford rises behind the goal. On the opposite side of the ground to the railway is a huge educational building that I seem to think used to be called a school back in the day.

Furniture wise, it’s a mixture of a fixed barrier and a rope, while the dressing rooms located behind the top goal are nearing completion having been built from scratch. No cover or seats, or indeed floodlights but in time I suspect they will start to appear. An awful lot of hard work has gone on to get the ground in shape, and all credit to the club for what they have achieved.

Views Towards The Flyover

They had a burger van, belonging to the Retford centre forward, however it could only operate a limited number of appliances at a time or it tripped out. Burgers were fine, but you couldn’t have chips, you could have a cold drink, but the kettle wouldn’t work. I daren’t think what might have happened if they’d needed to put the light on!  

We did chat to a Retford official, he was very friendly and informative, but not only that, with ten minutes to go he wandered around the ground to find us with complimentary cups of tea. What a very nice gesture, these things do leave a lasting impression.

As for the game, Hallam were always the better side, and having taken a first half lead, they scored a further two goals in the second period to record a comfortable victory. It was no slight on Retford though because higher league Hallam will be one of the sides looking for promotion this season.

For some reason the referee only appeared to play 40 minutes each way, maybe due to the gloomy evening and the reducing light, but time flew anyway, it always does when you are trading insults!

The Retford official invited us back for a game later in the season, and I suspect we’ll take him up on that offer. Besides, there are not many football grounds you can walk into and have your sexuality questioned in such a public manner.

But to be fair, we wouldn’t have it any other way!

A Work In Progress

The 30 Year Itch

Welling United  0  Charlton Athletic  3

Friendly

It was probably around 1986 when my curiosity developed towards Welling United Football Club.

I was given a programme from a game against Fareham Town and for whatever reason it struck a chord. It was also the era of the old Non-League Grounds publications, and when I saw a photo of the Park View Road ground, I liked what I saw, it was a traditional football ground, in an era when such beauties were starting to go by the wayside, notably inside the confines of the M25.

I’ve never actually seen them play though until today. I did once turn up one night at Ilkeston Town for an FA Trophy game just after it had been postponed, while on the couple of occasions they played at Alfreton Town in the Conference National, I was clearly somewhere else!

The Fabulous Main Stand

Visiting Park View Road has been on my agenda for a long time, but being a man of the completist variety, Welling United have never been in a league that I try to crack the champagne corks over. Today’s visit was not the original plan either, some weeks ago, before the pre-season schedules had been finalised, I booked some very cheap rail tickets to London, and the hope was to get to one of the remaining Football League grounds I needed to visit.

As it turned out Fulham were not playing, and Charlton Athletic were away, at Welling United. Immediately that fixture stood out, the chance to visit had arisen, so the planning started. It was relatively straightforward in the sense that the Euston bound train from Birmingham meant I was having a beer in Borough Market by 11am, and this meant the regular trains from London Bridge to Welling were a mere five minute walk away.

Borough was a busy place, traders were kept busy as curious onlookers meandered. Not so long ago this was a scene of devastation, but normal service looks to have returned very quickly as we refuse to allow the extremists to change our way of life.

The Park View Road End

A few scoops later and it was on the train to Welling, just a short 25 minute journey into Kent through Lewisham, Blackheath and Eltham, before disembarking the train onto the busy High Street. Charlton fans were already in the pubs as a precautionary Police presence patrolled the area. I chose to enter the ground and it was there that I soon met Peter Mason, who ran the clubs programme shop. We chewed the fat for a good half hour as he gave me some background on the club, and I browsed his wares. Peter was a hugely friendly and enthusiastic chap, so if you do ever visit Park View Road, look him up. If you are reading this Peter, thank you, and I won’t forget….!

What a superb ground, in my eyes anyway. You can sense the history by looking across it, and from my vantage point on the terraces behind the goal, you had great views across an expanse that not only Welling United call home, so do Erith & Belvedere, and this is where it gets a bit strange!

One side of the ground contains the old seated stand that is something of an iconic structure, with the social club and offices situated behind it. Behind both goals are open terraces, but then the opposite side is all about Erith & Belvedere. The social club, the tea bar and the stand are all very clearly belonging to them. So we have a non-league ground with two separate social clubs, and catering facilities, that are clearly defined and serve to support themselves. Bizarrely as well, the two teams emerged from either side of the ground, I don’t know whether that is normal or just the plan for today?

The Erith & Belvedere Side

Erith were clearly not wanting to miss out on the windfall nearly 1,500 spectators would bring so they had taken the decision to open up today, and to be fair, looking at the queues for both bars, it was probably a good job they did. I had a pint in each for the sake of keeping the peace!

But, quirks aside, it really is a fine venue, unspoiled by the power of the developer and the Atcost. I can imagine on that cold December Saturday with the light fading, when an unsuspecting Football League side pitches up for an FA Cup tie, with a full house tight to the pitch, it can be quite an atmosphere. Those days have gone before, and no doubt under new ownership, the hope is that those days will return.

A recent three season spell in the Conference National has caused some financial hardship, and being a small fish in a big pond as was, it has and will take time to recover. But hope springs eternal as they prepare for another season in Conference South.

The Far End

Welling played well, but the strong Charlton side had the finishing power. Two first half goals in front of a large travelling support set the tone, and then a third goal came with just three minutes remaining. It was a good workout for both sides, and in fairness to Charlton they send a strong side to Park View Road every season for what is now a traditional curtain raiser.

I had no time to hang around at the final whistle, and I just made the 5.03 back to London Bridge, which allowed me some chill time in All Bar One at Euston, and a moment to reflect on the day. It had been great, Park View Road did not disappoint and was worth the very long wait.

The journey back was an epic one, I finally disembarked the bus at the bottom of my road just before 11.30, but this is the price you pay with ticket splits and such like, they may be cheap but they aren’t especially direct or timely. But if your sole objective is a few beers and the football, it really doesn’t matter.

Curiosity settled, finally.

Positioned For A Quick Getaway

Wrong Shaped Balls

Rugby Borough  9  Clean Slate  0

Friendly

I can imagine that William Webb-Ellis was one of those really annoying schoolkids.

You are having a game of football with your mates and then without warning some clever little dick decides to pick up the ball and run off with it, and in the process of  brassing off all of his schoolmates,  the game of Rugby is suddenly invented.

Myth or legend that tale may well be, but young Webb-Ellis, while allegedly breaking all the rules in his days as a student at the Rugby School, is deemed to have been the man who created the game, and to that end he finished up having a World Cup named after him. Maybe not such a clever dick after all....?

And on a day when the elite British and Irish rugby players slugged it out for a stalemate with the sporting dynasty that is the All Blacks, it did seem wholly appropriate to the head to the town where it all started, but in this case, to watch the wrong shaped ball.

Rugby Town FC - The Orange Version

Football in Rugby is complicated, a bit like some of the rules in the oval ball game, and while you can have a basic grasp, to understand it properly you need to be part of it, or in the case of the football, you probably need to be from the town itself.

That said, I will try to summarise the story as best I can.

Rugby Town were historically the principal club in the town, up until 1973 when they ceased to play, which is very different to going out of business, I suppose the phrase you would use is that they were "In Abeyance" as a senior club. They reappeared in 1993, but disappeared again mid way through the 1995-96 season with their playing record expunged. Back they came again in 2000, but by 2004 they had once again vanished.

Across town VS Rugby (Valley Sports) were the junior of the clubs but following the demise of Town in 1973, they took on the mantle of the senior team and had success. The FA Vase was won in 1983 and the heady heights of the Southern League Premier Division were achieved. Along with that the Proper rounds of the F.A.Cup were reached on several occasions.

The club changed their name to Rugby United in 2000, much to the annoyance of the VS faithful, but then upon the demise of Rugby Town in 2004, the club that was United and formerly VS, decided to take on the name! Their time in the Premier Division came to an end, a move to the Northern Premier League followed, and then at the end of last season the club were relegated to Step 5 and the superb Butlin Road ground will host the lowest level of football it's witnessed since the early Eighties.

The Impressive Kilsby Lane

But, it complicates further still, because while the newly named Rugby Town play at Butlin Road, just further East is the Kilsby Lane ground of Rugby Town (Juniors) which looks like a completely separate club, and if anything is connected to the original incarnation of Town. So, we have two clubs called Rugby Town, or so it seems?

I guess while one was solely a junior organisation and one a senior club it was ok, but when the juniors want to branch into senior football then it's perhaps not quite so simple. Hence the recent birth of Rugby Borough Football Club.

Rugby Borough will be plying their trade in the Leicestershire Senior League this season, after initially looking like joining the Midland League. It was time to pay a somewhat curious visit to see what it was all about.

The entrance to the ground is through some gates adorned with Rugby Town in the colours of orange and black. You follow down a long driveway and as you arrive at the large car park, the facilities which are based on the very edge of town in a rural setting, open out in front of you. The single story club house and dressing rooms are modern and smart, while two pitches adorn the facility. A railed grass pitch that is used by AEI Rugby, and an artificial floodlit pitch that is to be Borough's home for the season.

They've been great with their use of social media, and of course the local written media has picked up on the story and run with it. Playing wise they do look to have assembled a very useful young squad that on first evidence will be a real handful at the level they'll be playing at. 4-0 up at half time against a willing but limited Clean Slate outfit from Milton Keynes, they ran out 9-0 winners. They looked very impressive.

The ground is very smart, the welcome friendly and a good number of interested onlookers had turned up to see the show. The club looked very well organised, professional in their approach, and forward thinking.

If I have stated any inaccuracies in the story of football in Rugby then I can only apologise for my ignorance and shoddy research, but as can be seen it isn't straightforward. However, from the basics of the story alone, it's clear that for a town of it's size, 'underachievement' is probably a word that wouldn't be deemed as overly harsh, certainly in recent years. While 'instability' might also be considered to be a fair word.

Maybe Rugby Borough can provide some of that stability and also some much needed success, but then again the supporters of VS Rugby (as many still call it) might have something to say about that.

William Webb-Ellis might also have had something to say about it, and it would probably be along the lines of sticking to the wrong shaped balls, it's much simpler.......

Rugby Town - Don't Ever Forget It

Taps & Tappers

Dodworth Miners Welfare  4  Worsbrough Bridge Athletic  0

Friendly

The Sheffield Tap seemed like the ideal location to ponder the start of the 2017-18 football season.

With racing at Doncaster the main event in South Yorkshire today, the inhabitants of the Tap were dressed to impress prior to catching the train to their destination. It was like ‘Love Island’ meets ‘Police – Camera – Action’, for some, today was extremely unlikely to end well, and we aren’t just talking financially…

As the bar emptied and the volume subsided, my thoughts turned to what the new season might hold. I’ve got some interesting journeys to plan for, South Shields, Scarborough and Llandudno to name but a few, while no doubt the air miles will be clocked up with trips to Ireland and Holland taking place before the turn of the year. Plus of course, let’s not forget the surprises, the unplanned, and at times, the downright ridiculous. It wouldn’t be the same without it.

Pure Miners Welfare

But right now it was all about pre-season, and that in itself can be a less than straightforward experience. I like to plan my July fixtures around some of the new grounds that are dropping onto the radar for the season ahead, but several factors need to be considered. Firstly, where are the games being played, and that issue knocked two potential games on the head today when it came to light that neither GNP Seniors or Beeston Rylands were playing at their ‘normal’ grounds. Then of course games can be cancelled at very short notice (ground not ready / one of the teams can’t raise a side).

Finally, and this is one to watch very carefully, the kick off time can move, and that is exactly what happened with Dodworth Miners Welfare. To their credit, the Twitter updates were really helpful, no doubts as to where the game was being played, but then a couple of days ago the scheduled 3pm kick off became a 1pm kick off.

I had always planned to go out on the train and have a few beers on the opening day, so it then meant a bit of careful planning to make sure two things could happen. Could I get to Dodworth for the game, but could I also arrive in time to sample a couple of lagers?

The 10am train from Belper meant I could make a connection in Derby and subsequently be in the Tap by 11am. I was taken aback somewhat as to how busy it was, but then I’d not considered the pony factor across the way. The Tap isn’t cheap, but it’s very good, and the Czech Lager went down a treat, in fact both of them did, I had just enough time to imbibe before the Huddersfield bound train arrived to take me to the final destination.

Vast Expanses - The Muck Stack In The Distance

Dodworth sits right at the side of the M1, to the West of Barnsley, and is in fact the next stop after leaving Barnsley Interchange. As a village of around 5,500 inhabitants, it’s growing in terms of its profile. Being as close as it is to the motorway network, a quantity of new housing has sprung up and in turn property prices have risen sharply. Commerce and Industry has taken root in the area formerly dominated by the mining industry, and as a result, Dodworth has become a village of choice, with many non-locals choosing to reside in the area.

But walking from the station into the centre of the village, it clearly still maintains its roots as a pit village. The Social Club and the Miners Welfare looked to be the only establishments open for a pint, and on the basis the football ground sat behind the Welfare, it seemed the natural choice to rest for a short while.

Sensibly priced beer, served in glass or plastic depending on your intentions, with a wonderfully warm welcome, the ‘Tappers’ as it’s known locally, was a busy venue, but time was tight, the game was due to get underway, and let’s not forget, that’s the real reason we are here today, right?

What a gem! The ground is a real blast from the past, a large covered area of terracing sat on the Welfare side built into a large natural bank. It’s the type of cover that can often been seen at Miners Welfare grounds, and I think about the likes of South Kirby, Kiveton Park, Bentley and Woolley. For a Step 8 (Step 9 last season), it’s a real cracker. The ground is railed on three sides, but its set into a vast expanse of grass, with plenty of room for a second pitch on the far side. Looking out on the far side the 'Muck Stack' is clearly visible, the former spoil heap from the mining days has now been landscaped and turned into a green haven.

A decent crowd gathered on a glorious day, including one or two from the travelling fraternity, some of whom had travelled huge distances (Southampton for one). I decided to sit on the grass bank with my plastic, and watch the new campaign begin in earnest.

Goals On Wheels

Dodworth were the better side throughout the game, taking the lead just before half time, and then scoring three more times in the second period against a much changed visiting team. I don’t read too much into pre-season results and performances, but suffice to say, despite being two divisions below the visitors, Dodworth looked like a side with confidence and no little ability. It could be a good season once again after gaining promotion at the end of the last campaign. Step 7 football would be befitting of the club and indeed the venue.

The final whistle arrived bang on ninety minutes and that gave me just enough time to make the connection back to Sheffield. I had time for one more in the Tap, it was very quiet for a Saturday afternoon, but then I guess it will be somewhat different when the trains return from Donny.

Football’s back, and what a great place to start.    

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