Losing My Religion

Mansfield Athletic   2   New Life   1

Derby Church League

It’s almost unheard of for me to be so cautious about writing a blog.

But, given my completely non-religious dispensation, on the basis that religion itself provides two things in life, a spiritual crutch and a reason to go to war, a visit to a game in the Derby Church League has put me into something of a quandary.

Right, let’s deal with the elephant in the room, I quite simply don’t get religion. I’m a factual / evidence based kind of individual, so if you can’t see it, can’t demonstrate it’s existence, then, in my World, quite frankly, it doesn’t exist.

I find the whole concept of praying, and indeed seeking some kind of comfort from an entity that, well, has no scientific evidence of it’s being, just a bit too idealistic, so, in my World of rationalisation and reconciliation, the whole concept is a something I simply struggle to entertain.

Besides all of that, show me a war that wasn’t based on religious ideology, and show me a terrorist that didn’t have religious fundamental ideals, then I’ll show you my third knacker, because lets be belt and braces about this, all I see in the modern World when it comes to religion is bad things, and much of it, senseless and unfounded.

Yeah, I get that I’m being simplistic and sweeping, and of course, I don’t profess to have anything like a true understanding of the wider picture, but for me, when it comes to religion it’s a ‘No’….

So with all that in mind, I decided on a Storm Alex blighted Saturday morning to dip my toe into a football competition that is, quite simply, designed for those with an attachment to the church. Why might that be you wonder? Well, you know the drill by now, a long list of grounds to go to, some of which can be visited outside of standard working hours when it comes to football, Saturday morning being one of those times. I’d heard of the Derby Church League and thought I’d give it a scan to see if any of it’s clubs happened to reside at one of my chosen venues.

Bingo, we had Mansfield Athletic, playing at Manor Recreation Centre in Mansfield Woodhouse, the appointed home venue of Manor FC, a team that has newly arrived in the Notts Senior League.

Now, other than a list of fixtures on Full Time, the social media presence for teams in this competition seems to be non-existent, and, finding a handbook was a fruitless task. I worked on the principle that I had no Plan B on a Saturday morning, if I went and it was on, great, if it was off, well nothing lost, it just meant I had a little bit longer to get to the afternoon game somewhere.

Storm Alex, as usual, was predicted to be the next in a series of apocalypses to hit the UK, so I have to admit to being cheered somewhat on Saturday morning when the rain was a mere drizzle and we still had a roof on the house. So, with a renewed sense of optimism, it was off to Woodhouse.

The Manor Recreation Centre sits at the end of Kingsley Avenue, which in itself is just off the main A60 road that runs to Warsop. There is always that sense of anticipation when you enter the great unknown and see the welcoming sign of cars in the car park, and possibly even football kit clad men ambling about in the general vicinity.

As I pulled into the car park I did indeed see cars, and men ambling about in football kits, it seems that the good Lord was indeed smiling upon me!

Crikey, it was a big old expanse, and spotting some kind of activity at the very far end of the complex I wandered down in the general direction to see Mansfield Athletic warming up, but as the 10.30am kick approached we had no sign of the away team, New Life, from Derby.

Not to worry though because out of the distance they came, and suddenly a referee also came into view, it did indeed look like the ceremony was about to begin.

Talking of ceremonies, they had a little one before kick off when the players all stood around the centre circle, before what appeared to be the home captain wandered to the centre spot. Something happened, I don’t know what, but the referee blew his whistle and we had a round of applause, no idea what it was, must be a Church League thing.

Anyhow, the rain was getting heavier now, and complete with Steve McLaren sponsored brolly I made my way to the side opposite from where the substitutes, management teams, supporters and general flock were congregated, and took refuge at the top of a small bank which was sheltered by trees.

As for the game, I’ll be honest, the standard was not fantastic, but it was competitive. I was half expecting a very gentile, polite and fulfilling affair, but, after ten minutes when a New Life player (they have a shirt sponsor – Jesus) was caught by a late tackle and advised a Mansfield player he was a “F***ing Bell End”, it gave me that nice warm feeling, this may be a Church League, but, it’s proper football!!

Mansfield took the lead in the first half and then added a further goal in the second period, however the visitors came back into it, despite having had a red card (yes, those as well!), and incurring the wrath of the home teams lady manager by trying to use too many substitutes! A late goal came for New Life but it wasn’t enough.

I have to say, it was a very enjoyable start to the day, and next week, it appears Socially Distanced Steve is paying them a visit, and he’s a bigger atheist than me. I see they’ve forecast lightning for Saturday morning……